I did a five day water fast, here’s what happened
Yes, it is as horrific as it sounds. Five days consuming nothing but water with the only variation being the water can be hot, cold, tepid or if I want to go absolutely nuts – sparkling.
WHY
Reason 1: For anyone who knows me, I’ve basically had a stomach ache for the last five years. I’ve tried everything – invasive medical procedures, veganism, no food after 6pm and a particularly depressing month last year where I cut out alcohol. Nothing has helped. When I read that water fasting re-sets your entire digestive system, I decided to give it a go.
Reason 2: There are tons of health benefits to fasting. Our bodies were designed to go for certain periods without food. When we were cavemen we’d hunt a deer, eat it and then maybe not find another deer for a few days. Our bodies can cope with this.
Reason 3: Digestive systems need a rest sometimes. Mine definitely does. It’s been doing a shit job of digesting anything for five years.
Reason 4: Not eating for five days doesn’t mean you will die. We all have excess fat in our bodies, stored away for a rainy day – today is the rainy day. Plus I’ve never gone more than 24 hours without eating, I was curious to find out how my body would react.
Reason five: Fasting means you break every bad habit you ever had. No sugar, no salt, no caffeine, no alcohol. Your body is taken to ground zero so that when you’ve finished you can re-introduce the stuff that’s really good for you.
Reason 6: Apparently you reeeeally appreciate food once you’re done.
So I did it. Here’s what happened…
DAY 1 (Tuesday)
9am: I ate my last meal of smoked salmon, eggs and avocado yesterday afternoon. Today for breakfast I have a glass of water.
1pm: My stomach starts rumbling aggressively. This is the first time in my life I’ve actively ignored this feeling. The rumbling and feeling of hunger stops 30 minutes later and didn’t come back during the entire fast.
4pm: I feel quite dizzy. I know it’s my blood sugar trying to figure out what the eff is going on. I feel slightly concerned for my wellbeing but I’ve done enough research to know that I won’t faint or die.
6pm: Met a friend for a drink, ordered a sparkling water, told them I was doing a water fast, they were horrified. Felt fine.
11pm: Went to bed feeling empty in my stomach and perhaps in my soul too.
DAY 2 (Wednesday)
7am: Woke up strangely early. Heart sank knowing I have a long, long way to go before this is over. I still don’t feel any hunger but my body is extremely sensitive to the cold. My hands and feet are freezing. I feel quite depressed about this whole thing.
12pm: I did all the work I needed to do and then lay down for a two hour nap. I’m really tired. I never usually need to nap.
3pm: I had to go to work. The idea of doing anything is much more traumatic than actually doing it. As soon as I get up and leave the house I feel fine and I have all the energy I need. So basically my body is preserving my energy for when I actually need it (theory). Also, I feel like absolute shit.
8pm: Got home from work, had another juicy glass of water and watched the last episode of Mad Men (which is good up until Series 6 and then is absolute shite btw.)
DAY 3 (Thursday)
8:30am: Woke up, feel extremely empty and very thirsty but not hungry. I feel much better than I did yesterday, emotionally and physically. I know I’m over half way through this ridiculous idea. I boil a cup of hot water to make me feel like I’m consuming tea.
12pm: Again, as soon as I need energy it’s there. The weirdest thing is how methodical I am being. Everything I do is totally unhurried, almost meditative. All of my chores are perfectly manageable. My eyesight is a lot sharper and I feel very calm. I haven’t experienced any anxiety at all since I started fasting and my thoughts are slow and ordered.
3pm: I’m being extremely productive. My concentration is much better than usual and I’m getting loads done. By this time my body is in Ketosis, this means that all the glucose it usually runs on is gone and it’s starting to burn all the stuff I stored away for a rainy day, like the 5am kebab on my way home from Watergate last weekend.
6pm: Time is moving very slowly. I want to go to the cinema but I’m worried it’ll be too cold in there so I just stay in my bed and watch Fauda until 10pm. I go to sleep just so the time will pass quicker. My dreams have been quite vivid, often about food, and I’ve been sleeping very well for about 10 hours a night.
DAY 4 (Friday)
8:30am: Woke up with a really gross taste in my mouth. Feeling delighted that this is my last full day of fasting. What I miss the most is the routine of having meals, cooking, being able to look forward to the next meal. With that gone your life is structureless. I’ve got this far by reminding myself that I will have a meal again. Quitting smoking was harder – I couldn’t tell myself I was going to smoke again.
9:20am: I went to a 1.5 hour yoga class. I’ve read that you can still exercise while fasting, it’s just better to wait until your body has got used to the no-food thing first. At yoga I stationed myself next to the radiator to make sure I was warm enough but my body temp seems to have balanced out. In fact, I feel much, much better today. I managed the entire yoga class with no problems. My sweat smelt weird. The taste in my mouth is the worst.
12pm: The ultimate test; I went food shopping for when I break the fast tomorrow. Everything looked very bright. The pears stood out as an excellent concept, I bought two of them. I will DESTROY them tomorrow.
3pm: Annoyingly, I feel really really good. I wish I felt this way on day two, everything would’ve been much easier. One evening left and then I’m done. The end is in sight.
6pm: I had a meeting with my German tandem partner and she wanted to get a slice of pizza. So I just spent the last two hours watching her eat pizza in front of me. Having not eaten a morsel in FOUR DAYS. A true test of my patience.
8pm: Having a sick-ass Friday night. Did a face mask which I’m trying to use as a replacement for a meal. Like, the process of doing a face mask replaces the process of cooking and eating a meal. That makes sense in my head. Now I’m going to watch a film and go to sleep as quickly as possible because tomorrow morning I CAN EAT!!!
Day five (Saturday)
7am: I should technically wait until 3pm until I eat something but fuck that. It feels like I’ve been living in a dystopia for the last five days. I’m still not actually hungry. I make myself a banana and peanut butter smoothie and a peppermint tea. I’m more delighted about the act of preparing it than consuming it, although it does taste great. My body is confused.
12pm: I’ve been invited for all-you-can-eat Israeli brunch at Gordon’s in Neukolln. I manage a small plate of shakshuka, smoked aubergine and hummus and feel full. Everything tastes fucking glorious.
What did I learn?
This fast wasn’t about weight loss – it was purely to re-set my digestive system and to rid my bod of sugar, salt, caffeine and alcohol. Six weeks later and I haven’t eaten or craved any refined sugar and I don’t add salt to my food anymore.
Before I did this fast, food was my enemy. Every time I ate I was certain it would give me a stomach ache, no matter what it was. My stomach is much less painful now and I’m able to digest food much better.
I eat fruit all day. Love pears. Never used to spare a thought for pears, now I can’t get enough of ‘em.
The worst part of the entire thing was mental rather than physical. It was a depressing five days. Taking food out of your life takes away more than just the pleasure of eating. You take away the anticipation of your next meal; the joy of looking forward to what you’re going to eat next. The ritual of shopping for ingredients, the act of cooking with a friend or partner. I did miss food but I missed the pleasure that goes with it more.
Glad I did it but never again, basically.
